LINE (OCEAN OF OCEANS)

In the hold of a slumber, captivating and broad,

I went to a place where present and past had fought

to know each other’s place—a moment in time which I had no say

The phone rang on its own, tugging the looped thread of a familiar voice

out of its container, before I could decide to invest my attention on its uncoiling

My name was a juicy fruit, sweet and dark, dripping down the phone’s intercom

my ear fabulously captivated by its liquid and the tenacity of the phone call itself

A deep, vast ocean lived on the other end

Its reverb, a medley of wind and unsent messages unbinding, coming toward me in bundles,

before I could decline

I entertained the sound, engulfed by the tone and whatever it meant to me

It gripped my heart like nothing ever could,

and I tried all that I could to pretend that it did not

I tried to be natural, to have grown from the last time, as I always did

It was a dream I had not been expecting

It made it to me anyway, told me things, anyway

The ocean pulled toward me,

the sound of the same voice layered five times came to me quickly'

almost meeting the brown of my feet—I contained my excitement—

and then pulled itself in, just as abruptly

It was at that moment I realized how much I wanted it

Its captivating nature, the way it twisted and turned into itself, all while coming straight forward to me,

I wanted it, terribly

I wanted to leap into it and let it sweep me away into its chaos,

but it ran away, leaving me at shore, once again

I was much safer there, that I knew

I stood there, drenched in blue, of course

I was the moonlight’s main attraction

I watched a bright red ‘W’ beam and glisten atop of the waters at the far end,

which did not have to make sense, because this was my dream

I remained composed when it went

I did not allow the water to whisk me away, because I did not believe that it wanted to

I pulled back, which was my way of standing my ground

[against the feeling of being unwanted by this ocean]

Its sound, so captivating

So indulgent, yet so inaccessible

Why be on a waiting list that does not exist?

I’ve been to many beaches

I’ve laid on many shores

yet, there lies no comparison

How come?